Collaborative Divorce

My Spouse Just Asked For A Divorce, What Do I Do?

March 20, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Your spouse just asked for a divorce. It may be that you never saw this coming, have been completely blindsided by this news, and are shocked and confused. Or maybe you knew this conversation was coming. Either way, it’s hard to hear your spouse say “I want a divorce”.

Now that the actual “divorce” word has been spoken, you’re not sure what your next step should be. Should you take action? Or, do you wait for your spouse to make the next move? It seems so overwhelming.

WHY SHOULD YOU SEEK A CONSULTATION WITH A DIVORCE ATTORNEY BEFORE YOUR DIVORCE IS EVEN FILED?

If your spouse just informed you that they want a divorce, it’s time for you to take action and seek a consultation with a divorce attorney. You don’t have to be the one to file the divorce. But at this point, you need to understand your rights and obligations as it relates to a divorce.

WHAT SHOULD YOU TALK ABOUT AT THE INTIAL CONSULTATION?

During your consultation you should ask questions about the divorce process and issue that specifically relate to your situation. If you have minor children you need to discuss custody, parenting time, and child support. If you own a home, you need to talk about what will happen with the home. If you have personal property, you need to know how it will be divided. If you have retirement accounts, you need to talk about how these accounts will be divided. If you have a long-term marriage, you want to find out if you are entitled to spousal support (or if you will have an obligation to pay). If you own a business, you should understand how that business interest will be divided.

WHAT IS THE BENEFIT OF A CONSULTATION?

With knowledge comes peace of mind. By seeking a consultation with a divorce attorney now, you can obtain answers to your questions before your family, friends, and spouse share their opinions. By seeking a consultation now, you can learn how the divorce process really works, and what possible outcomes you can expect – it can help you understand what will happen and take steps to face it. You do not want to face this challenge alone and should seek legal representation to guide you through the divorce process.

GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

We understand that filing for divorce can be an emotional and confusing experience. That’s why we are committed to providing personalized service to each client we represent and will be with you through this difficult journey. At Schmitt Law, PLLC we encourage clients to take a more collaborative approach to divorce that promotes positive communication and cooperation. Through mediation or the collaborative divorce process, Laurie guides her clients through amicable divorce settlements so they can move forward with their life. To discuss your circumstances and legal options, contact Schmitt Law, PLLC at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation. Or contact us online to arrange a consultation.

What Your Divorce Attorney Cannot Do For You

March 16, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

If you are about to file for divorce, it’s important you to know what your divorce attorney can’t do for you. The following are things your divorce attorney can’t do for you.

CHANGE THE MICHIGAN LAW

Simply put, your divorce attorney doesn’t have a magic wand to change the law as it relates to your divorce case. You may love what position the Michigan law supports, or not. But your divorce attorney can’t change the law.

SPEED UP YOUR CASE

Your divorce attorney can’t change the mandatory waiting period in your divorce case. Michigan law establishes waiting periods depending on the individual circumstances.

If you do not have minor children of the marriage: There is a two-month waiting period after the filing of the Verified Complaint for Divorce has been filed.
If you have minor children of the marriage: There is a six-month waiting period after the after the filing of the Verified Complaint for Divorce has been filed.

A Judgment of Divorce cannot be entered earlier than these established times.

ACT UNETHICALLY

When your divorce attorney represents you, they must do so within the applicable parameters of Michigan law. This means your divorce attorney can’t be required to engage in conduct that is illegal, unethical, or fraudulent. If your divorce attorney can’t ethically abide by your requests, they must withdraw from representing you.

TAKE ACTION AGAINST THE BEST INTEREST OF YOUR CHILD(REN)

If your divorce involves minor children, your divorce attorney will refuse to engage in conduct that, in their professional judgment and knowledge of the law, would be contrary to the best interests of Client’s minor child(ren). This means your attorney can’t assert any position or engage in any action that they deem contrary to the minor child(ren)’s best interests.

COMMUNICATE WITH THIRD PARTIES

Your divorce attorney can’t talk to third parties, and must protect information relating to the representation of you from disclosure to third parties. If you wish for your divorce attorney to speak to third parties such as family members, you must provide them with specific consent to do so.

MAKE PROMISES ABOUT THE OUTCOME OF YOUR CASE

Your divorce attorney can’t make any representation to you, nor any assurances as to the favorable or successful resolution of your case. This means your divorce attorney can’t promise you a specific outcome, nor make promises as to the nature or amount of any awards or distributions of property, attorney’s fees, costs, or any other aspect in your divorce. It’s important to note that your divorce attorney can’t promise you particular results as the court has the sole power to decide all issues.

GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

If you are contemplating or in the process of a divorce or separation, contact the Michigan divorce attorney, Schmitt Law, PLLC. Our office understands that family law matters often involve complex relationships and dynamics that can enhance decision-making stress. We provide clients with the security to approach these challenges with confidence. Our dedicated attorney will provide clients with individualized attention and strategic case preparation to address all parts of their cases. We invite you to contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation.

Why Does Schmitt Law, PLLC Charge For An Initial Consultation?

March 13, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Schmitt Law, PLLC receives many calls requesting a free consultation. Most people accept that attorneys charge a fee for their time. But callers still believe they shouldn’t have to pay for a consultation, because they can obtain a free consultation from other attorneys.

A paid consultation avoids time-wasters — and here’s why Schmitt Law, PLLC charges for their initial consultation:

TIME IS A LIMITED COMMODITY

When you hire Schmitt Law, PLLC, you receive personal service and prompt replies to your communication. In order for us to provide the level of service that you deserve, we can’t afford to tie up our time giving free legal advice.

SHOPPING SPOUSES

It’s not unheard of for spouses to shop attorneys. This means your spouse may seek consultations with numerous attorneys in an effort to limit your options when you go to hire an attorney. Once a family law attorney has met with you or your spouse, they are barred from meeting with the other spouse. Charging a nominal consultation fee is often a deterrent to this behavior.

QUALITY OF THE CONSULTATION

The old saying is you get what you pay for. At Schmitt Law, PLLC we want to provide you with the best advice possible at your initial consultation. In order to do so, we need to have a complete picture of your situation. So that we may properly analyze your case, our consultations are one hour (or more).

JUST LOOKING FOR FREE LEGAL ADVICE

At Schmitt Law, PLLC, we want to meet with people serious in retaining our firm. So often people want a free initial consultation as they believe that if they obtain enough information, they can run their case on their own. We have no intention of wasting your time, or overselling you on services you do not require. And in turn we do not want our time wasted. If you are looking for general advice, please review our blogs and website.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC, after reviewing the facts in your case, we will provide you with a detailed explanation of your rights as it pertains to divorce. We will help you to obtain the information you require to help you move forward.

GRAND RAPIDS DIVORCE COLLABORATIVE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

If you need to know more about a Michigan divorce, including how to file for a divorce, contact an experienced attorney, Laurie Schmitt at Schmitt Law, PLLC. Schedule your consultation today with a dedicated attorney. We look forward to speaking to you and being your advocate during this crucial time in reframing your life. Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC online or call (616) 608-4634 to arrange a consultation.

Is It Best To Delay Our Divorce Until Our Children Are Grown?

March 9, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Potential clients come into the office seeking legal advice regarding a divorce. At times, I hear that maybe it’s best they wait until their children are grown before they divorce. These parents justify their position to wait and stay married until the children are grown for many reasons, as follows:

They can avoid the custody battle that they are sure will take place
They will be able to provide the children a more stable environment if they stay married
They will not have to uproot the children from the only home they have ever known
They will not have to relocate the children to a new school

It’s admirable to put your children’s needs first when it comes to a divorce. However, are you making the right decision when you decide to stay in an unhappy or dysfunctional marriage until your children are grown? The truth is that while divorce does impact your children, it’s how you and your spouse handle yourselves during the divorce that matters. How well your children get through the changes depends on how well you help them through the process. What can you do to help your children through your divorce:

You can eliminate the conflict with your ex (at least while in the presence of your children)
To the best of your ability, keep your children’s schedules and routines the same as it was while you were married
Make sure that the children know you and your spouse love them and that they were not the reason for your divorce
Promote with your children that it is alright to love both you and your ex.
Address your anger and frustration with the divorce and your ex. Your children learn from your actions, and parrot back your behaviors.

There never is a perfect time to divorce. However, if you stay in your marriage, are you and your spouse able to provide the children with an emotionally safe and stable environment? Or, do you and your spouse argue, fight, or worse yet engage in the silent treatment with each other – all in ear shot of the children? When you are trying to decide to divorce verses stay married, you need to look at all of the circumstances and weigh the good against the bad.

How your children handle your divorce depends on how well you and your spouse work together towards a positive outcome in your divorce. What you decide to do will depend on your specific circumstances. Children are resilient. And perhaps what’s best is to provide them with two happy homes verses one filled with anxiety.

GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

The Most Frequently Asked Questions As It Relates To Divorce

March 6, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

1. WHAT WILL THE TOTAL COST OF ATTORNEY’S FEES BE IN MY DIVORCE CASE?

There is no one size fits all answer for this question. The total cost of attorney’s fees for your divorce will depend on many factors such as who you retain as your divorce attorney, their hourly rate, the complexity of the issues in your divorce, are you able to reach an agreement before or at mediation, will your case require discovery, and will your case require a trial.

2. HOW LONG WILL MY DIVORCE CASE TAKE TO COMPLETE?

Michigan law establishes statutory waiting periods depending on the individual circumstances.

If you do not have minor children of the marriage: There is a two-month waiting period after the filing of the Verified Complaint for Divorce has been filed.
If you have minor children of the marriage: There is a six-month waiting period after the after the filing of the Verified Complaint for Divorce has been filed.

A Judgment of Divorce cannot be entered earlier than these established times.

3. IS PARTICIPATION IN THE MEDIATION PROCESS MANDATORY IN A DIVORCE?

In many counties in Michigan the judge will require attendance at mediation before he/she will schedule a trial.

4. WHAT IF WE HAVE AN AGREEMENT BEFORE FILING THE DIVORCE?

Then we would file your complaint for divorce and draft a judgment of divorce incorporating the terms of your agreement. A final hearing can be set in your case (to be held after the statutory waiting period has passed).

5. ARE WE ALLOWED TO USE ONE OF OUR ATTORNEYS AS A MEDIATOR?

Even if one of your attorneys is a domestic relations mediator, an attorney cannot represent one party in a divorce and assume the role as the mediator. Why? It is imperative that mediators be a neutral third party (meaning they do not know either party in the divorce action).

6. IS IT MANDATORY THAT BOTH MY SPOUSE AND I RETAIN OUR OWN ATTORNEY IN OUR DIVORCE ACTION?

No. There is no legal requirement that parties to a divorce be represented by an attorney. Even if one party has retained an attorney, the other party is not required to be represented and may represent themselves in court.

A GENTLER DIVORCE. GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC we encourage clients to take a more collaborative approach to divorce that promotes positive communication and cooperation. Laurie K. Schmitt, founder of Schmitt Law, PLLC, is an Attorney, Mediator, and Collaborative Divorce lawyer. When possible, she guides her clients through amicable divorce settlements so they can move forward with their life. Contact Laurie at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation to discuss the collaborative divorce process and how it can benefit you.

What Should Your Divorce Attorney Do For You?

February 27, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

If an attorney agrees to represent you in your divorce case, they have obligations to you. What are those obligations?

COMMITMENT:

Your divorce attorney should commit to giving you their very best effort in representing you. Note, that you walk in the door of a law office with a specific set of facts and issues. No divorce attorney can change your facts. But they do owe you their commitment to represent you to the best of their ability and within the limits of the Michigan law.

COMMUNICATE:

It’s important that your divorce attorney respond promptly to your communications. At the onset of your relationship with your divorce attorney, ask them what you should expect for return calls and emails. Frustration happens in your relationship with your divorce attorney when you don’t know what to expect in the communication process.

BE HONEST:

Your divorce attorney should tell you the truth about your case. After all, you are paying your attorney to tell you the truth, not tell you what you want to hear. And remember, don’t shoot the messenger.

KEEP YOU INFORMED:

There is nothing worse than being frustrated because you have no idea what is going on in your divorce case. Don’t be shy about asking your divorce attorney for updates on your divorce case. And expect that your divorce attorney will keep you keep you informed of progress and developments in your case. Informed clients make for happy clients.

EXPLAIN THE LAW IN MICHIGAN:

You are paying your divorce attorney for their expertise in the area of family law. Make sure you have your specific questions answered, and that you understand the law as it applies to your case.

EXPLAIN PROCEDURE:

Ask your divorce attorney about procedural questions as it relates to your divorce. Divorce attorneys are more than happy to explain the steps in the divorce process.

ALLOW YOUR ATTORNEY TO DO THEIR JOB:

If you’re having issues with your spouse, let your divorce attorney know. Don’t take matters into your own hands. An issue cannot be addressed by your divorce attorney if they don’t know about it. If you allow your divorce attorney to do what they have been hired to do, it will reduce your stress and anxiety through the divorce process.

GET HELP FINALIZING YOUR DIVORCE. GRAND RAPIDS DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

Divorce in Michigan is a complicated procedure with long-term implications. It’s important to understand your rights and duties at each stage of the proceeding so that you will be in the best position to move forward during and after the divorce. Advice from an experienced divorce attorney can make all the difference in your outcome.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC, we work to ensure that our clients have the information and guidance they need to make the right decisions for their family and their future. Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation.

Is There Such A Thing As An “Easy” Divorce?

February 23, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

The divorce process is emotionally difficult for both you and your spouse. And the process can be made even more difficult if you and your spouse get in a mindset that you want to fight.

But, is there a way to make your divorce “easy”? The answer is yes you can make your divorce “easy”. If you and your spouse approach your divorce enter into your divorce with the right attitude, you can make the process smooth. The following are a few tips on how to make your divorce process “easy”.

COMMUNICATION

If you and your spouse effectively communicate and can have logical discussions about important decisions that must be made in your divorce, then you are well underway to a straightforward divorce.

AGREEMENTS

Before filing for divorce, you and your spouse should resolve all issues related to your marriage such as custody, parenting time, and division of assets. The more issues you and your spouse can resolve prior to filing for divorce, the easier your divorce process will be. By coming to agreement before the divorce filing, or shortly thereafter, you will save money on attorney’s fees and on your emotions.

EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT

Clearly, you and your spouse have an emotional investment in your divorce. And when you or your spouse allow your emotions to control your decision-making process, that’s when divorces become difficult, time consuming, and expensive. You and your spouse should do your best to prevent revenge or anger to dictate the negotiation process. With that in mind, you and your spouse can reach the final outcome of your divorce.

GOAL

The goal in your divorce should be for you and your spouse to reach a fair and equitable agreement, placing your children first. And hopefully, all done while maintaining some respect for each other. The sooner you and your spouse can get through the divorce process, the sooner you will be free to start your new life. The goal should always be to act in good faith, and reach your agreement as soon as possible. To summarize, an easy divorce is one where you and your spouse can quickly agree and resolve the terms of your divorce while maintaining civility towards the other.

GET HELP FINALIZING YOUR DIVORCE. GRAND RAPIDS DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

Why Won’t Divorce Attorneys Take My Case?

February 20, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Top Reasons Why An Attorney Will Not Accept Your Divorce Case.

CONFLICT OF INTEREST

The attorneys may have already provided a consultation to your spouse. If that’s the case, they can’t provide you with a consultation, nor accept your case.

YOU ARE A RETREAD

Retread: a client who has gone through more than one attorney. If you’ve already had several attorneys working on your case, and fired them or been fired, it can be an easy assumption that the issue isn’t with the attorneys you have retained.

RETREAD…CONTINUED

If you have represented yourself in your case, or had previous attorneys who have done a poor job, it may too late for another attorney to fix the mistakes. There are times that mistakes can be corrected, and times that it’s just too late. When an attorney takes on an existing case, they take on the responsibility of that case (good and bad). Attorneys are reluctant to accept cases that have not been handled correctly. And, it may be a waste of your time and money to start again with yet another attorney.

LACK OF RESPECT

If you are disrespectful to staff, an attorney does not want you as a client. Staff is the backbone of any law office. And attorneys will protect their staff from abusive behavior from clients. Staff is the gatekeeper to the attorney. If you are rude to the staff, don’t expect to get a favorable response from the attorney.

YOU ARE SELF-VICTIMIZING

The definition of self-victimization (or victim playing) is the fabrication of victimhood for a variety of reasons, such as to justify real or perceived abuse of others, to manipulate others, as a coping strategy, or for attention seeking. It’s not the role of a divorce attorney to destroy your spouse because you feel like a victim. Most divorce attorneys don’t want to spend their days punishing the opposing party in a divorce.

FAILURE TO LISTEN

Many divorce attorneys grow frustrated with clients who refuse to listen. You can’t throw money at an attorney and expect them to continually dig you out of a hole for your bad behavior. If an attorney must spend their time keeping your behavior in check, there is no time to work your case. And bad behavior will certainly assure you of a bad result. No attorney wants that for their clients.

COURSE OF BUSINESS

Attorneys that are sole practitioners may have little to no staff. They may not be equipped to accept cases that will require hours of discovery and depositions, or attendance at a lengthy trial. And with every attorney, they review their case load to determine if they are able to accept a specific case, and still ensure they are able to provide the client with an appropriate level of service. If your case will be complex, it may be best to seek a firm with more resources on hand.

GET HELP FINALIZING YOUR DIVORCE. GRAND RAPIDS DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

Collaborative Divorce

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