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Laurie Schmitt Family Law

W. Michigan family law specializing in Collaborative Divorce

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616-608-4634

  • Home
  • About Laurie Schmitt
    • About Laurie Schmitt Attorney
    • Honors and Awards
  • Divorce
    • Separate Maintenance
    • Spousal Support and Modification
    • Alternative Divorce Options
      • Mediation
      • Collaborative Divorce
      • Uncontested Divorce Process
    • Annulments
      • Grounds For An Annulment In Michigan
      • What Are The Differences Between An Annulment Verses A Divorce?
  • Family Law Services
    • Child Custody
    • Change of Domicile
    • Child Support
    • Post-Judgement Modification
    • Enforcement of Court Orders
    • Limited Scope Services
    • Uncontested Divorces
  • Paternity
    • Affidavit of Parentage
    • The Michigan Paternity Act
    • How Does A Paternity Case Work
  • Blog
  • Contact

Issues Concerning Children

Substance Abuse and Fighting For Custody/Parenting Time

September 11, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Fighting for custody and parenting time of your children is a hard enough road. But, if you have an ongoing drug or alcohol problem, it makes it a much more difficult to navigate your case.

WHAT DOES A JUDGE LOOK AT

child custody and addiction

What will your judge look at in determining your custody case if the other parent is alleging you have an alcohol or drug problem? The following are just a few of the things a judge will review before granting you custody and parenting time if the other parent is alleging you have an alcohol or drug issue:

  • What type of issue are you having: alcohol or drugs?
  • Does the other parent have clear documentation of your alcohol or drug problem?
  • If you have a drug problem: what is your drug of choice?
  • How long have you been battling with your addiction?
  • Are you currently treating with a counselor?
  • Are you attending AA or NA meetings?
  • How often do you attend AA or NA meetings?
  • Do you have a sponsor?
  • What will your sponsor say about you if asked to testify?
  • Have you sought treatment at an alcohol or drug treatment facility?
  • How long have you been clean/sober?
  • What proof can you provide of your sobriety?
  • Can you pass a drug test today and throughout your custody case?

WHAT CAN HAPPEN IN YOUR CASE

What may happen in your custody and parenting time case if the other parent is alleging you have an alcohol or drug problem? The answer is: it depends. However, the following are just a few of the things the judge may require from you if it can be proven you have an ongoing alcohol or drug problem.

  • You may be subject to supervised parenting time. This could be with a family member, or at an agency. If it is with an agency, you may be solely responsible for the cost.
  • You may be required to take drug and/or alcohol tests. These drug/alcohol tests may be solely at your cost.
  • You may be required to purchase a device that tests your sobriety prior to and/or during your parenting time.
  • You may have your parenting time suspended if you are unable to successfully pass tests, and are unable to remain clean and sober.
  • If may not be given overnight parenting time.

WHAT YOU NEED TO DO

  • You need to be prepared to prove your sobriety.
  • If you are not attending AA or NA meetings, or not attending regularly, you need to attend meetings and do so on a regular basis.
  • You need to get a sponsor, and build that relationship so that you can maintain your sobriety.
  • You need to seek appropriate counseling for your alcohol or drug addiction.
  • Stop lying to yourself and others. You need to stay completely sober. This means you can’t substitute one addiction for another and say you are clean and sober. As an example of a common statement client’s make: I had an opiate addiction, but now only smoke marijuana or drink alcohol. I am clean and sober. Are you really clean and sober?    

In summary, your sobriety is directly related to the best interest of your child(ren). If you can’t or won’t maintain your sobriety, it will have a significant impact on what type of custody you are granted, and the amount of parenting time you will get to exercise. Only you can do the work to maintain your sobriety and fight for your rights as a parent.

CHILDREN ARE FIRST.  GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC we understand that the interests of your children always come first. Whatever your situation, Schmitt Law, PLLC is experienced, sympathetic and willing to help you achieve the best outcome for your entire family. Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation. Our office is located at 401 Hall Street SW, Suite 112D, Grand Rapids, MI 49503.

Filed Under: Issues Concerning Children Tagged With: Children, Collaborative Divorce, Substance Abuse

Co-Parenting – What’s In It For You?

August 28, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Why is it important to you to co-parent? What do you gain from effectively co-parenting with your ex?  What’s in it for you? 

The most important (and obvious) reason to effectively co-parent with your ex is that your children are watching your behavior. They are analyzing how you handle issues with your ex. They learn by your example. And the lack of effective co-parenting takes its toll on your children. 

Your children are depending on you and your ex to be their role models. Two adults arguing over trivial issues presents a pitfall spectacle. You and your ex should be aware of the example you are setting and the lessons your children will learn from your constant arguing. And that lesson to your children is that adults should turn minor disagreements into a war.

Co-Parenting and Divorce

Note that effective co-parenting is for the benefit of the children. When you co-parent with your ex, keep in mind how wise and generous decisions will affect the future and benefit of your children. And the benefits to your children include children that don’t feel they are in the middle of your war, and children that have fond memories of their childhood because they are left out of adult wars. As your children should come first and foremost to both you and your ex, co-parenting should be second nature.

It’s not easy trying to co-parent with the very person who you divorced. There’s so much history, and it may not all be good history. But everything is not about you, your ex, or your divorce. It’s no longer about what brought you and your ex to end your marriage. It’s about the best interest of your children.

All too often, family law practitioners must educate clients on matters that should seem common sense to parents. Matters such as the importance of co-parenting, and how to effectively co-parent. And it’s a shame that people must receive common sense advise from attorneys. Or worse yet, hear it from a judge. 

So next time you and your ex disagree on an inconsequential issue, stop and think about what’s best for your children.  How will getting into a war positively impact your children? And is the outcome that your ex is suggesting good for the children? If so, why start a war. To summarize, be better parents when the occasion calls for it.

GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC we encourage clients to take a more collaborative approach to divorce and post-divorce matters that promotes positive communication and cooperation. Laurie K. Schmitt, founder of Schmitt Law, PLLC, is an Attorney, Mediator, and Collaborative Divorce lawyer. When possible, she guides her clients through amicable divorce and post-divorce settlements so they can move forward with their life. Our office is located at 401 Hall Street SW, Suite 112D, Grand Rapids, MI 49503. Contact Laurie at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation to discuss the collaborative divorce process and how it can benefit you.

Filed Under: Issues Concerning Children Tagged With: Children, Collaborative Divorce, Family Law

Back-To-School Co-Parenting

August 7, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Once again, you find that your children’s summer vacation is coming to an end. And it’s time again to get your children ready to return to school.  So how can you and your ex make your children’s return to school easier?  By effectively co-parenting.  And what does that mean? 

The following is a short list of decisions that you and your ex can make together to make your children’s transition to school easier:

co-parenting and back to school
  • Are the children changing schools and need to be enrolled?  If so, who will be responsible for enrollment?
  • Are both of you in agreement to change the school of your children?  If not, have you filed a motion with the court seeking a change in schools?
  • Will the children’s school have an orientation?  Are both of you aware of the date?  Have you agreed on who will be attending the orientation?
  • Who will shop for school clothes, backpacks, and other school related necessities?
  • How will the cost of these items will be divided?
  • If you’re exercising a summer parenting schedule that differs from the school year, when will you and our ex return to the school year parenting time schedule?
  • When will you start transitioning the children to a school time evening routine and bedtime?
  • Are you and your ex willing to abide by a specific bedtime that will be upheld at both of your homes?
  • Do your children need a haircut before school starts? If so, who will take them and who will pay for it?
  • Do the children need to see the doctor or dentist before school starts?  If so, who will schedule and take them to these appointments?
  • Do the children want/need to be enrolled in extra-curricular activities?  If so, who will be responsible for enrollment and who will pay for it?
  • Are both of you in agreement to the children being enrolled in extra-curricular activities?  If not, have you filed a motion with the court to resolve this issue?

What other child related issues do you encounter with your ex when you’re getting the children ready for the new school year to start? By having a discussion with your ex in advance, you can make the back-to-school process smoother for your children, and yourself, by preventing the battle before it begins. If all else fails and you and your ex are unable to come to agreements regarding major decisions, it may require court intervention to resolve the issues.  If this is the case, you need to allow yourself enough time to file a motion and be heard by the court. 

CHILDREN ARE FIRST.  GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC we understand that the interests of your children always come first.  Whatever your situation, Schmitt Law, PLLC is experienced, sympathetic and willing to help you achieve the best outcome for your entire family. Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation. Our office is located at: 401 Hall Street SW, Suite 112D, Grand Rapids, MI 49503.

Filed Under: Issues Concerning Children, Other Family Law Issues Tagged With: Back to school, Co-Parenting

What Is The Process In A Paternity Case In The State Of Michigan?

July 31, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

If a child in Michigan is born to unmarried parents, paternity will need to be established. It can be as easy as both parents voluntarily signing an Affidavit of Parentage. Or it will require the assistance of the court to establish paternity.

Paternity Case

WHAT IS AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

An Affidavit of Parentage is a form signed by both unmarried parents that acknowledges, under the penalty of perjury, that they are the biological parents of a child.

CAN I FILE A CUSTODY CASE WITHOUT AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

If you and the other parent signed and filed an Affidavit of Parentage, either of you may file a custody case to establish custody, parenting time, and child support. However, if you do not have an Affidavit of Parentage, you will need to establish paternity before you can file a case for custody, parenting time, and child support.

HOW DO I ESTABLISH PATERNITY VOLUNTARILY?

A father’s legal paternity must be established before custody, parenting time, and child support can be established. To voluntarily establish paternity, the mother and father can sign and file a sworn statement called an Affidavit of Parentage. There is no requirement that a DNA test must be taken. Once both parents have signed the Affidavit of Parentage, it must be filed with the Central Paternity Registry in Michigan.

WHAT HAPPENS IF I SIGN AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

Once you have voluntarily signed and Affidavit of Parentage, it establishes paternity. When there is an Affidavit of Parentage in place, paternity is now established. 

Under Michigan law, once an Affidavit of Parentage is signed:

  • It gives initial custody to the mother until either parent starts a custody case.
  • It allows the child’s mother to seek child support from the child’s father.
  • It allows the child’s father to seek custody and/or parenting time with the child.
  • It allows the father’s name to be added to the child’s birth certificate.

WHEN CAN YOU SIGN AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

An Affidavit of Parentage often gets signed by the parents when their child is born, but it can be done any time during the child’s life.

HOW DO I ESTABLISH PATERNITY THROUGH THE COURT?

Either parent may seek to establish paternity. And signing the Affidavit of Parentage is voluntary. If either parent does not agree to sign an Affidavit of Parentage, it can’t be used to establish paternity. If this is your situation, then either the mother, father or prosecuting attorney can file a paternity case.

If court intervention is necessary, the first step is for a complaint to be filed with the court, and a hearing to be set. Next, you would serve the other parent with the complaint and notice of the hearing. A hearing will be held wherein either party may request a DNA test. If a DNA test is requested by either party, then that test will be court ordered.  The father, mother, and child will be required to go to a lab and provide samples for the DNA test. Once the results of the DNA test are done, and it is determined that the party is the father, then the case may move forward to determine custody, parenting time, and child support.

WHAT IF I’M NOT SURE I’M THE FATHER?

If you have any doubt about whether you are the child’s biological father, you should obtain a DNA test before you agree to sign the Affidavit of Parentage. You must be 100% certain you are the father before you voluntarily sign the Affidavit of Parentage. If you are sure you’re the father of the child, the Affidavit of Parentage can be signed so that you can establish yourself as the child’s biological and legal father.

WHY SHOULD YOU REQUEST A DNA TEST?

When you sign the Affidavit of Parentage, you waive your right to request a DNA test, and waive your right to contest paternity through the court. If a DNA test shows that the alleged father is the biological father, the judge will sign an Order of Filiation. An Order of Filiation establishes paternity, making the alleged father the legal father. Custody, parenting time, and child support decisions would then be made in the paternity case. 

WHAT IF YOU DISAGREE WITH THE PATERNITY TEST?

If the purported father disagrees with the results of the DNA test, then a trial will take place in which the court will either establish an order of paternity or, if appropriate, dismiss the claim.

GET HELP ESTABLISHING RIGHTS TO YOUR CHILD. GRAND RAPIDS FAMILY LAW ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

Paternity in Michigan is a complicated procedure with long-term implications. It’s important to understand your rights and duties so that you will be in the best position to move forward during and after you establish your parentage. Advice from an experienced family law attorney can make all the difference in your outcome.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC, we work to ensure that our clients have the information and guidance they need to make the right decisions for their family and their future. Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation. Our office is located at 401 Hall St., Suite 112D, Grand Rapids, MI 49504

Filed Under: Issues Concerning Children Tagged With: Michigan Law, Paternity Case

What You Need To Know About An Affidavit Of Parentage

July 24, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

THE LAW

  • The Acknowledgment of Parentage Act (APA), MCL 722.1001 et seq.:  Unmarried parents may establish paternity under the APA by signing an affidavit of parentage, which gives a child born out of wedlock or born or conceived during a marriage but not the issue of that marriage (as determined by a court of competent jurisdiction) the same status as a legitimate child.

WHAT IS AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

An Affidavit of Parentage is a document used to establish paternity is cases where the parents are not married to each other at the time their child is born. 

affidavit of Parentage

WHO SIGNS AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

An Affidavit of Parentage is signed by both parents and acknowledges that they are the biological parents of the child.

WHAT DOES AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE DO?

An Affidavit of Parentage acknowledges who the parents are. By acknowledging parentage of a child, it allows the judge to make a determination regarding custody, parenting time, and child support.

WHEN IS AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE SIGNED?

An Affidavit of Parentage is typically signed at the hospital after the birth of the child. However, if the biological father was not present at the birth, you and the other parent can voluntarily execute an Affidavit of Parentage and file it with the State of Michigan at any time.

WHAT IF ONE PARENT WILL NOT AGREE TO SIGN THE AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

If one parent is not willing to voluntarily sign the Affidavit of Parentage, either parent may establish paternity by filing a motion with the court and requesting a court order establishing paternity.

CAN I BE GRANTED CUSTODY OR PARENTING TIME WITHOUT AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

If you are the father of the child, a judge will not grant you custody or parenting time without paternity being established. This means that you will be obligated to produce to the judge a copy of the Affidavit of Parentage before the judge can grant you custody or parenting time.  If you do not have an Affidavit of Parentage, you will need to file a motion with the court to establish that you are the father before the judge can assist you with custody and parenting time.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO SIGN AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

As stated above, an Affidavit of Parentage voluntarily acknowledges who the parents are. By voluntarily signing the Affidavit of Parentage, you are waiving your right to a DNA test to determine if you are the biological father. And, by signing the Affidavit of Parentage you are taking on legal responsibilities to that child and will be obligated to pay child support.

WHAT IF I AM UNSURE THAT I AM THE FATHER? SHOULD I SIGN AN AFFIDAVIT OF PARENTAGE?

If you have doubts that you may not be the father, you should request a DNA test to be performed.  As stated above, there are serious legal consequences to signing the Affidavit of Parentage before requesting a DNA test. 

GET HELP ESTABLISHING RIGHTS TO YOUR CHILD. GRAND RAPIDS FAMILY LAW ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

Paternity in Michigan is a complicated procedure with long-term implications. It’s important to understand your rights and duties so that you will be in the best position to move forward during and after you establish your parentage.  Advice from an experienced family law attorney can make all the difference in your outcome.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC, we work to ensure that our clients have the information and guidance they need to make the right decisions for their family and their future.  Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation. We are located at 401 Hall Street SW, Suite 112D, Grand Rapids, MI 49503.

Filed Under: Issues Concerning Children Tagged With: Affidavit of Parentage, Children

Can I Move With The Children After The Divorce?

July 10, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

Are you contemplating moving out of town or out of state with your child?  Will this move be more than 100 miles from the child’s current legal residence?  Has the court awarded you joint legal custody or sole legal custody?

THE 100 MILE RULE

Before you decide to move with your child, you should review your court order. Did it grant both of you joint legal custody of the minor child?  If so, you will be unable to move with the child more than 100 miles from the child’s current legal residence without consent of the other parent or permission from the court. The child’s legal residence is where each the parties lived on the day your judgment of divorce was signed by the judge. 

EXCEPTION TO THE 100 MILE RULE

move with children

Did your court order grant you sole legal custody of the minor child?  If so, this is the exception to the 100 Mile Rule. If you have sole legal custody, you will not have to seek the consent of the other parent, or the permission of the court if you want to move more than 100 miles from the child’s legal residence.    

SEEKING AN ORDER FROM THE COURT

You have joint legal custody of the minor child, and the other parent will not consent. You’ll need to pursue your request for a change of domicile through the court. The court will review the factors found in MCL 722.31 to determine if they will grant your request for a change of domicile. 

WHAT THE COURT REVIEWS TO ALLOW A MOVE

MCL 722.31 Factors:

(a) Whether the legal residence change has the capacity to improve the quality of life for both the child and the relocating parent.

(b) The degree to which each parent has complied with, and utilized his or her time under, a court order governing parenting time with the child, and whether the parent’s plan to change the child’s legal residence is inspired by that parent’s desire to defeat or frustrate the parenting time schedule.

(c) The degree to which the court is satisfied that, if the court permits the legal residence change, it is possible to order a modification of the parenting time schedule and other arrangements governing the child’s schedule in a manner that can provide an adequate basis for preserving and fostering the parental relationship between the child and each parent; and whether each parent is likely to comply with the modification.

(d) The extent to which the parent opposing the legal residence change is motivated by a desire to secure a financial advantage with respect to a support obligation.

APPLICATION OF THE FACTORS

When applying these factors, the court’s main focus is whether the move will improve the quality of life for both the child and the relocating parent, not just the parent. The focus must remain on the child. Courts want to hear about quality-of-life issues such as:

  • The quality of the schools in the proposed location. The court will determine if the school is comparable to the child’s current school. 
  • The availability of extra-curricular activities. If the child is currently involved in extra-curricular activities, what is the availability of similar activities for the child in the proposed location. 
  • The presence of extended family in the current location verses the proposed location. 
  • Any other factors that provide the court with specifics of how this move will enhance the child’s life.

SEEK A QUALIFIED ATTORNEY

Because of the complexity of a change of domicile case, it can be difficult to represent yourself. And, you can expect that the results for a change of domicile case will vary significantly from court to court, as courts interpret the standards for a change of domicile very differently.  If you are thinking about relocating with your children, contact Schmitt Law, PLLC to discuss your options.   

AN ATTORNEY WHO UNDERSTANDS YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES.  GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC, our clients benefit from years of experience.  We treat every client as an individual, taking the time to understand your unique situation, so as to best advise you on the steps you should take. Whatever stage your life is at, you can trust Schmitt Law, PLLC to guide you through the legal process with expertise and compassion, because we understand that family comes first. Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation.

Filed Under: Issues Concerning Children Tagged With: Children, Collaborative Divorce

Do You Need To Protect Your Rights As A Parent?

June 29, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

HELP!  I just want to see my kids a be a significant part of their lives without interference from the other parent.

You just want to be a parent to your children.  However, the other parent does everything they can think of to make your live miserable.  It’s as if they just want you to walk away, throw in the towel, and say I won’t see my children any more. 

Protect Parent Rights
  • Do you have a current parenting time order that the other parent continually violates? 
  • Are you constantly going back and forth with the other parent fighting to exercise your court ordered parenting time? 
  • Does the other parent schedule activities for the children on your parenting time? 
  • Does the other parent refuse to meet you at exchanges, or are they constantly late? 
  • Does the other parent try and control every aspect of the children’s lives, including what takes place in your household? 
  • Does the other parent attempt to micromanage the decisions you make during your parenting time (what the children will wear, eat, and what activities they will participate in)?
  • Does the other parent attempt to cut you out of the children’s lives? 
  • Does the other parent fail to keep you informed about medical information as it relates to the children?
  • Does the other parent fail to keep you informed about school related issues and activities?
  • Does the other parent make unilateral decisions regarding the children that fall under your joint legal status?
  • Does the other parent make their own rules, contrary to the court order?
  • Do you feel that no matter what decisions you make regarding the children, the other parent believes it is not good enough?
  • Does the other parent disparage you, your significant other, or your family in front and/or directly to the children?
  • Does the other parent interfere with your holiday parenting time?
  • Does the other parent dictate the terms of every facet of the children’s lives, without considering your impute? 

Are you tired of the stress and anxiety you expend trying to gain rightful access to the children? Do you feel that you get no respect as the children’s parent?  Frequently, parents contact Schmitt Law, PLLC frustrated that they are not being allowed to exercise their rights as a parent, or that they could not come to an agreeable parenting time arrangement with the other parent. If you are experiencing issues in your relationship with the other parent, contact Schmitt Law, PLLC to discuss your rights and options as a parent.

CHILDREN ARE FIRST.  GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

At Schmitt Law, PLLC we understand that the interests of your children always come first.  Whatever your situation, Schmitt Law, PLLC is experienced, sympathetic, and willing to help you achieve the best outcome for your entire family. Contact Schmitt Law, PLLC today by completing our online contact form, or calling us at (616) 608-4634 to schedule a consultation. Our office is located at 401 Hall Street SW, Suite 112D, Grand Rapids, MI 49503.

Filed Under: Divorce, Issues Concerning Children Tagged With: Children, Collaborative Divorce, Custody

Tips To Successfully Mediate Parenting Time

June 23, 2023 By Laurie Schmitt

You’re scheduled for mediation, and one of the issues to be discussed will be parenting time. The following tips will help you successfully mediate a parenting time schedule that will be fair, balanced, and enforceable.

KNOW THE BASICS 

Prior to mediation your attorney should explain what legal and physical custody really means so you are prepared to make an agreement at mediation. You should also discuss the importance of having an order for parenting time.

AGREEMENTS ARE BINDING

Golden Rule: If you sign it, it’s binding.

Before entering into a mediation agreement, it’s important to understand that if you sign the agreement, it becomes a contract that is enforceable by the court. There is no buyer’s remorse later. So, fully understand the terms of the agreement before you sign your name.

MEDIATION PROCESS

Parenting Time

The mediator may control the process, but you and the other parent exclusively control whether you come to agreement regarding parenting time. And if you’re going to have a successful mediation, you must be willing to listen to the mediator and the other parent, do not interrupt anyone, and avoid making derogatory comments that may inflame the other parent. Respect is key during mediation.

GETTING READY

Gather important information such as work schedules and a calendar of what parenting time you have exercised since the divorce filing. Also have a list of points or concerns you want to raise during mediation. This may include the other parent’s new relationship or living situation, or how active the other parent has been in raising the children.

YOUR CHILDREN’S SPECIFIC NEEDS 

During mediation it’s your responsibility to make sure the mediator knows the ages of your children and any special physical, social, and emotional needs each of your children may have.  This will assist the mediator in helping you develop a parenting time schedule that takes into consideration the needs of your children.

MAKE YOUR PARENTING PLAN REALISTIC  

When you attend mediation, make sure you are negotiating for a parenting plan that is realistic – one in which each parent can uphold their end of the agreement. As an example, don’t select pick up and drop off times during the other parent’s work day. You know they can’t follow through with it, so why make the agreement? Make sure your agreement makes sense and is realistic for both of you.

MAKE YOUR PARENTING PLAN ENFORCEABLE

Golden Rule: If the judge can’t enforce it, it doesn’t make any sense to include it. 

Don’t put language in your agreement that can’t be enforced by the judge. What’s the point?  It may make you or the other parent feel better. Your parenting time agreement should be specific.  In the event the judge needs to enforce your agreement, it needs to be clear to the judge what you intended. If you only state that parenting time shall be agreed upon by the parties, it would not be enforceable. Language that is specific will reduce confusion, as each party understands their rights and responsibilities.  And clear language is much more enforceable if the need for court enforcement arises. 

WHAT YOUR AGREEMENT SHOULD INCLUDE

Make sure to include a designation of legal and physical custody, and a clearly defined parenting time schedule. The parenting time schedule should address if the parties are going to exercise the same schedule year around, or if it will be different during the school year versus the summer break. Your agreement should also address how you will communicate with the other parent: email, text, or an app designed for communication between parents. 

BE PREPARED TO MAKE CONCESSIONS

Mediation is about negotiation.  Do not go into mediation thinking you will receive everything you want. Be prepared to listen to the other parent, make concessions, so that you can reach an agreement that is fair and equitable for both of you. And before you enter into mediation, know what terms you are firm on and what you are flexible on so it can be communicated to the mediator. 

LET ME WORRY ABOUT WHAT MATTERS MOST … YOUR FAMILY.  GRAND RAPIDS COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE ATTORNEY SERVING KENT, OTTAWA, AND ALLEGAN COUNTY.

The hallmark of my family law practice is providing you with top quality legal service by being intensely responsive to my clients. I will work hard to protect your rights to your children by helping you to secure the best possible outcome to complex legal situations and giving you your strongest voice in the family law process.

To schedule a consultation or to learn more about our services, contact Schmitt Law, PLLC online or call (616) 608-4634. Our office is located at 401 Hall Street SW, Suite 112D, Grand Rapids, MI 49503.

Filed Under: Issues Concerning Children Tagged With: Children, Collaborative Divorce

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Laurie K. Schmitt
Attorney, Mediator, and Collaborative Lawyer

401 Hall Street SW
Suite 112D
Grand Rapids, MI 49503

Phone: 616-608-4634

Visa and MasterCard Accepted
Laurie Schmitt of Schmitt Law, PLLC is a West Michigan family law attorney specializing in collaborative divorce as well as separation, divorce, child custody and support, paternity, and other family law litigation. She is licensed by Michigan State Bar and the U.S. District Court for the Western District of Michigan, and has extensive advanced training in divorce mediation and collaborative divorce.

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